There is a need to understand people better, communicate more effectively, and more than anything else, be able to communicate with ourselves. In large Organizations, the work environment is effected not only by the external environment and external communication between people; it is actually largely affected by internal communication and internal environment within each individual working in the team. All of this can have a huge impact on how people interact with each other at work, and this ultimately reflects in the quality of the work they do. So, is there a way we can actually gain control of our life and drive it the way we want, rather than let our life drive us?
“The secret of success is learning how to use pain and pleasure instead of having pain and pleasure use you. If you do that, you’re in control of your life. If you don’t, life controls you”……Anthony Robbins, world’s number one motivational speaker.
What is NLP?
Neuro Linguistic Programming (or NLP) is a revolutionary field of study that explains how the mind works and how one can change one’s thoughts and belief systems and achieve one’s full potential. It explores the relationship between how we think (Neuro), how we communicate with each other and to ourselves (Linguistic), and how we program our thought patterns and behavior (Programming). NLP is an attitude and a methodology, a set of techniques, which leads to excellence, and enables you to weave magic in all areas of your life. It is considered as one of the most effective methods currently available that help us see and plan a way forward in our personal and professional life.
Everything you experience is created first in your mind, and then through your action and behavior, and this has direct relevance to the results you get. The experiences you create are representative of your internal state, your beliefs, which govern on the way you think and the feelings that your thoughts generate. So when you have the tools to change your internal state, you will find that your external reality will change to match the new internal state.
It doesn’t matter how your life has been so far. It doesn’t matter what’s happened in the past. All that matters is now. Change can happen in an instant, and making changes, even really big ones, can be much less scary than you might imagine. All you need is to change your thinking and you can learn how to do that using very simple but highly effective techniques.
Dealing with People
The ‘Neuro’ and the ‘Linguistic’ part of NLP deals with how people think, what they really mean when they say something, and how you can use your communicative skills to influence people. NLP is all about being in the other person’s ‘Model Of The World’, i.e. understand how the other person thinks, what are his/her learning strategies, beliefs, etc, and then acting accordingly. Rapport is the first building step for a fruitful conversation, which leads to mutual trust, understanding and great relationships. If you are able to learn how to build rapid rapport with almost anyone that you desire, and then be able to pace and lead the conversation, this becomes a very effective tool that can be used to influence people during sales meetings, negotiations, resolving conflicts, handling difficult people, etc.
The language that people speak, the words that they use, and the way they say things are so very important, that many times we miss finding out what is it that the person really wants. For instance, when a person says he cannot do a piece of work, is this because of lack of self-belief, or lack of skill, or a self-esteem issue? If we are able to tap deep into this aspect of the person, then we can ask the right questions to elicit the required behavior and results.
Understand other People’s Perspectives
Most people, when faced with problems, look to others for solutions. This is because we want someone else to look at our situation from an independent perspective and advise us. Also, a very key aspect that high performing people have, is the ability to view situations differently. But how would you like it if you had the skills to look at the situation from different perspectives by yourself? The results could be amazing, and you will be able to apply this to a variety of problems in your life such as, handling conflicts, relationship issues, understand what your client is looking for, reviewing proposals from client perspective, solving problems, etc.
The Art and Science of Coaching
Coaching is a collaborative process of learning between a qualified Coach and the Coachee, designed to tap into their full potential. A Coach understands their goals, identifies the obstacles and removes the mental and emotional blocks that get them into a ‘stuck’ state, probes, and pushes you towards where you want to go. Coaching involves asking the right questions, and probing into detail in a way that helps the Coachee think out a solution. Understanding this aspect of Coaching equips you with the skills to ask the right coaching conversations even during normal discussions with your teams, and allows you to dive deeper below the surface of the root cause of the issue. This is so useful for managers, doctors, parents, teachers, etc.
Making the Goals work for you
It is stated that nearly 80-85% people who set goals for themselves, fail to meet them. They may have the necessary competency, skills, and also the right environment to operate, but do they really believe they can achieve it? Are their goals in line with their values? Moreover, are you setting the right goals for yourself, or are your beliefs limiting you from setting the right goals that you truly deserve to achieve? How would it be for you if you are provided with a structured and systematic method and tools to understand where the challenges are coming from, what’s stopping you from moving forward, and where exactly one needs to make those changes in your life in order to make your goal work for you?
Re-programming your Past
Most people have a past – either some pleasant memories, or some are bad memories which they would rather forget. Unfortunately, sometimes the bad memories continue to influence our present thoughts and actions. This is how fear of public speaking, phobias, nervousness, exam fever, etc. takes place; for some people, even pains and allergies have a past emotion attached. Through NLP, we can erase these bad memories and emotions from our past, and ‘rewrite your personal history’.
Shyam Kalle is a certified NLP Coach Master Practitioner and regularly conducts NLP Practitioner workshops. He is also a practicing Career and Performance Coach, certified by ICF (International Coaching Federation). He brings with him, rich IT Corporate experience having worked previously, at senior positions
Mind Matrix Wellness Studio is an Accredited ICTA Institute (International Coach & Trainer Association: Europe and Russia, which carries out professional NLP Training Programs based on different methods of personal development and transformation where we share common standards of professional teaching and are united by common coaching approach to transformation supervised by the NLP Master Trainer and the Founder of ICTA and Akasha Healing System: Jack Makani.
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